Tuesday, March 31, 2009
I made this on Saturday and it was delicious. I've branched into homemade bread, juice and muesli, I suppose it was only natural that liqueur would follow suit!
Very easy to make - I do recommend it.
6 unwaxed lemons
150g caster sugar
Grate the zest from the lemons and juice them. Put in a bowl with the sugar and stir lightly to combine. Cover with clingfilm and leave to stand overnight. The sugar should be fully dissolved.
Strain the syrup through a fine sieve, or line a sieve with kitchen paper and strain through that, into a jug. Stir in the vodka.
Pour the liqueur into a clean bottle. Serve in small glasses, on the rocks, with Bach on the stereo, and Under the Tuscan Sun in hand. But candlelight and chess worked well too :)
I'm not sure how long it keeps, but I haven't got much left!
Monday, March 30, 2009
TS and I celebrated earth hour at 8.30 on Saturday night with scented tea lights, chess and homemade limoncello. Yes, I have branched into the extravagantly specialist arena and started making my own liqueur! It was zesty and sweet and delicious. I'll be making it again.
We light candles most nights. But it felt wonderful to be doing our bit.
How did you spend earth hour?
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Seeing that I'd been talking about food SO much lately, I thought I'd continue the theme that Lucy started and talk about my Top 5 Danger foods, or "Frankenstein Foods" as dear Ash used to call them!
But as I started thinking and writing, I honestly couldn't think of anything to write down. I could think of plenty of delicious things I like that would fall into a "treat" or "every now and then" category and I started writing these down, but then thought to myself, "come on Phil, you honestly could stop after one piece/one scoop/ a handful. You don't like it that much!"
So the list remained empty.
What a revelation. There isn't actually a food that I would consider a "danger", that once I started eating I honestly couldn't stop.
Because it isn't the food that would make me not want to stop. It would be how I was feeling at the time that would keep the hand going in the packet, or the spoon reaching for another mouthful. If I was feeling bored or lonely, no doubt a bag of crisps or a whole tub of coconut yoghurt would be more appealing than usual. But it's the feelings that would make me eat, not the food itself. Very interesting.
But I've also got to admit that those occasions are also a rarity for me. I actually seem to have this under control! These days, I don't let boredom or loneliness or anxiety be my excuse for doing things I know are not in my best interests. First of all, I don't keep things in the house that would tempt me - if I wanted something, I'd have to walk up to ASDA to get it, which makes me think twice about whether I want something or not. And second of all, I know that food doesn't solve my problems. It doesn't get rid of the feeling. It alleviates it for about three minutes. But then I'm holding an empty packet and I'm back to square one.
I honestly can't remember the last time I started eating something and couldn't stop. I have a wonderful relationship with food now. There's no guilt, there's no tension, there's no compulsion to eat the whole lot at once. The thought of eating food that I am not physically hungry for makes me feel ill. If I feel like having something, be it a row of Galaxy with Caramel Hazelnuts (mmm!) or a small chips from the chippie, I will have it, and enjoy it. If I don't think I will enjoy it - either because I'm too full, or because I don't really feel like it that much, then I'll forget about it and either find something else or wait until I am hungry. It's really that simple!
Ash wrote a very illuminating paragraph in a post she did today, and I hope she won't mind me quoting her:
Note how positive the experience was, rather than a guilt inducing one.
I had a bucket of hot chips today. I really really felt like them. I never really eat chips.. Maybe one or 2 at mums if they get chicken and chips but I usually don't want them- they always seem to get stuck in my throat and are all claggy.. but today I enjoyed them so much. I don't know if I was craving salt or starch but they did the trick. It was so nice to want something like that, and decide to have it and for it to just really hit the spot.. mmmm! I don't really get any cravings these days. My mind rarely dwells on food like it used to. In the old days, I rarely didn't think of food. It was always either thinking about what I should or shouldn't eat or what I had just eaten or wanted to eat. Now I generally think about food when I get hungry and then I see what we have and try to make the best choice with the options available. It's become as un-complicated as that.
I really really felt like them.
I enjoyed them so much.
It was so nice to want something like that, and decide to have it and for it to just really hit the spot.
That's what all our food experiences should be like! Putting things into a category where you feel like you should fear them, limit them or avoid them just perpetuates this mindset that if you are overweight you shouldn't be enjoying your food, you should just be eating as little as possible.
Certainly, when I started losing weight there were some things I did have to limit - because let's face it, you won't lose weight if you don't - and there were some things that I just stopped eating all together because I knew that a low fat replacement wouldn't be as satisfying, and it took a long time to be able to have a block of chocolate in the house without the fear that I would demolish the whole lot and then some in one sitting! But mostly I removed these things because psychologically they were ties to the old me, the old ways of coping. I didn't want them, or need them, anymore.
Having been at goal nearly three years now, my feelings about how I eat and what I eat are very similar to what Ash described. I think about food when I'm hungry, and make the best choices with the options available. I eat things I like, and I enjoy them!
I also exercise. A lot. And that makes the food side of things so much easier.
It wasn't always this way though. I used to have a lot of issues with food, which is why I got to 103.5kg in the first place. I'm trying to piece together how I arrived at this place where I'm at right now, because a lot of people ask me about that.
It was very much a gradual thing, but it happened with a lot of effort, and paying attention to things that triggered overeating. It was a time in my life that required a lot of strength, and a lot of tenacity and determination to get to the bottom of things, once and for all. It didn't happen without a lot of effort - I really want to emphasise that. One must be willing to embark upon emotional work that is necessary to address these problems. It's not enough to just want the situation you're in to change - you must be willing to change as well. I had to challenge everything, everything that felt natural to my body and my psyche had to be taken apart and examined. What was making me do this? How could I address the feelings/issues without sabotaging all my hard work? How could I learn a new way of coping?
As crazy as it sounds, a lot of it was learning to talk to myself, in a loving and supportive way about how I was choosing to cope with a situation. A typical conversation in my head would be - I think the only reason you want to eat that chocolate is because you're feeling a bit sad. Why are you feeling sad?
After I'd thought about it and either said it out loud or written it down, then:
What would make you feel better? How about we ring [a friend's name]? That would cheer you up! Or what about that new yoga DVD from the library? Let's put that on!
Before you all think "fruit loop!", it really worked. For most of my life I had been taught to ignore or smother negative feelings. I didn't know how to listen to them and resolve them. I was just taught to make them go away as quickly as possible. Talking to myself like this made me feel listened to, and made me realise that negative feelings weren't something to be ashamed of or feared. They just needed to be acknowledged.
Gradually, I grew to like the healthier me so much and was so proud of myself for setting a goal and sticking to it, that I didn't want to resort to my old ways of coping and living. Sitting on the couch with a 4 litre tub of icecream had no appeal whatsoever. I wanted to keep going. I still had to keep myself in check, but very slowly the new ways I'd taught myself to cope were becoming the automatic response.
As time went on and I reached my goal, food just wasn't a big deal anymore. I had so much more going on in my life to worry about it. It wasn't something I turned to for comfort anymore, or even thought about on a constant basis anymore. It was a way to fuel myself to get through my day, and to be able to perform well on my runs, bike rides and triathlons. It was a fun way to socialise with friends. But that was it. When I opened the fridge, Cheesecake didn't smile and say "hey Phil, how about you and I catch up for a bit..." - in fact, Cheesecake had moved out!
My health is so important to me, both in a physical and mental sense. I eat things that make me feel good. As I said in a previous post, my idea of a treat these days is having white rice instead of brown. I want to put only good things into my body, that will help me run harder and faster, that will give me energy, and that will make me feel great! If I do overindulge, I feel it. My body doesn't operate as well, and I feel sick and queasy if there's too much sugar/fat/preservatives in what I've eaten. It's not worth it!
Having spent the greater portion of my life with a very f*cked up attitude to food, if anyone had told me that I'd be able to get it under control, I would have laughed. But that's true of lots of other wonderful things I have in my life right now - if anyone had told me that I'd be living in London, writing, travelling, and living with a gorgeous man, I would have laughed too. My point is, no matter how hopeless things might feel right now or how far you might be from what you want to achieve, if you're willing to put in the work, make the changes you need to make, and stick to them, come what may, you can get there.
There is no magic wand, there is no all-in-one programme, there is nothing that will do the hard work for you. You have to do it. And you have to be in a place where you are prepared to do whatever it takes. If you need a bit of extra help then see a counsellor or a support group (I cannot recommend that highly enough). No looking back. Your thinking should not be this is what I have to do to lose weight - it should be this is how I live my life now.
As I've said many times, what it all comes down to is you - you either want to do this, or you don’t. If you really want to become a healthier, fitter person, in your heart of hearts, then you will find a way to do it and you’ll stick to the goals you’ve set for yourself. You will stop at nothing to get there. But if you don’t really want to do it, you’ll always find an excuse not to.
Life will never be perfect. But it certainly is so much easier when you decide to make the most of your circumstances, and do whatever it takes to succeed, regardless of the obstacles in the way. It won’t happen by itself – and there will be days when you’ll feel like packing it all in. But it does get easier, with time and effort. Before long, you’ll be doing so well and feeling so good that it will just become a way of life for you. You won’t want to give up.
You’ll have confidence and a glow from regular exercise and healthy eating. You’ll know that you’re in control of your life. Your body will run so much more efficiently because of the good stuff you're feeding it. You’ll feel good about yourself when you wake up every morning.
I think that beats sticky date pudding any day.
That is unless YOU decide to give your power to these things.
You are the one and only source of power in your life.
- Louise Hay
Tony of "I don't want to die of a heart attack when I'm 25" writes a letter to himself which he reads when he's tempted to binge - I think it's a great idea!
It's Not You, It's Me - a break up letter from an emotional eater
Jonathan and his friend Carolyn have wise words on how to stop hugging chocolate
How to develop a healthy relationship with food
Fit and Female: developing a healthy relationship with food
Dietgirl's fabulous article How to beat cravings which deals with how to avoid a binge in the first place by that wonderful P word: planning!
Friday, March 27, 2009
In it, I copied poems I liked or pasted in quaint little pictures cut from various Vogue Entertaining and Travel magazines, but mostly I copied in quotes that I wanted to remember.
Green Ink is kind of like a scrapbook for me. So today I'll share a few quotes that I've found lately that have inspired me, that I'd like to remember.
Poetry is what elevates the banal and neglected object to a realm of art. It can transform the thing that might have made people fearful into something that invites them to look, and look a little longer, and maybe even understand. "
- Aimee Mullins
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."
- George Bernard Shaw
"Everywhere I go, I find a poet has been there before me."
- Sigmund Freud
"Zest is the secret of all beauty. There is no beauty that is attractive without zest."
- Christian Dior
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
The hyacinths, that is.
My flat smells of spring.
Outside, these snow and sleet soaked buildings remember the sun. I felt it warm my back all afternoon.
Journal being filled with poems and scraps of thoughts while I live, eat, make my way from a to b.
The heart is longing for so many things at the moment. Retreat day is this week! I'm looking forward to seeing what comes of it.
than the risk it took to blossom."
- Anais Nin
1. Haloumi cheese on 9 grain bread
I absolutely love haloumi cheese, flash fried in a non-stick pan with sprigs of fresh mint or basil wilted over the top as it sears, served on soft, fresh 9-grain bread fresh from the oven (or breadmaker, in my case!). It's salty and savoury, and a delight to eat (I love the squeak it makes) and if the sun is shining, I could be fooled into thinking I was sitting by the Aegean. Sometimes I pile some sauteed spinach and roasted red peppers on the bread as well. So, so, so good. And takes about 60 seconds to make. Seriously. When it comes to fast food, you don't get much faster (or delicious) than this.
2. Root vegetable curry with basmati rice
I find anything with rice is a great filler - and rice leaves me feeling comfortably full, rather than pasta which I find a lot heavier these days. This curry is so sweet and fragrant, and the rice acts as a sponge for the incredible sauce.....it's just so delicious, and I only need a small bowl to feel like I've eaten like a queen.
3. Hot chocolate
There's a face in it, I swear!!
Well, this is strictly a drink rather than a food, but it always satisfies a chocolate craving. I heat soy milk in a saucepan on the stove, and then whisk in four or so tablespoons of Green and Blacks hot chocolate powder, and whisk it to a velvety chocolate sheen. If I've been good, or it's late at night, I might add a slurp of chocolate liqueur from Bruges! But otherwise, it's soothing and salving, sweet and luscious without being cloying. I never used to feel satisfied with low-fat hot chocolate powders or anything like that, I'd have the mug half filled with powder and it still wouldn't feel special enough, which feeds my theory that it is far better to have good quality stuff and have it occasionally, than low-calorie unsatisfying alternatives every single day. It's such a waste, when you think about it.
4. Homemade muesli with yoghurt
There is simply something so moreish about this homemade muesli. Maybe it's the spices. Maybe it's the crunch of the nuts, or the fudginess of the dried fruit. Maybe it's because I know it's so darn good for me! But this stuff is seriously hard to beat for a healthy breakfast, or a pre-run snack. I especially love it over thick, creamy, flaky coconut yoghurt. Mmmm. It also makes an awesome breakfast bar.
5. Anything with chickpeas in it
Hummous, chickpea salad, felafel, or even just a scoop out of the can - I don't know what it is, but these little critters of nutty goodness just keep me so full and satisfied, and they taste so darn good!!
Other contenders for the top 5:
- Baked beans, either on their own with a bit of baby spinach wilted on top, or on toast
- Any really good cheese, served on slivers of fresh pear or on oatcakes
- 9 Grain toast with organic peanut butter and a thick, fruity jam
And your tastes really do change. Once I couldn't imagine a life without icecream. Now there's a tub in my freezer that's been there since......January? I can't remember the last time I had some!
These days, my idea of a treat is having white rice instead of brown.
Please share - what's in your top 5?
Monday, March 23, 2009
Well, that was an interesting week! I got a bit tired of having to remember to photograph all my food though (and forgot a few times!) but overall it was fun, and a good tangible record of how I'm going. Tracking either in a journal by hand or with photos and captions on line is a great way to motivate yourself with your progress.
It was also a nice reassuring exercise for myself - I do have moments where I really beat myself up for not achieving more, or for not doing more, but seeing all my eating spread out over the week, I can see that I'm actually not doing too badly on this thing called maintenance. I look after myself, I eat well and feel pretty darn good most of the time!
What I think I do well, and what I hope came across in the food what i ate series:
- I eat a lot of vegetables
- Most of my meals are based on fresh ingredients
- I allow myself a few treats on the weekend
- I only eat when I'm hungry
- I don't binge, even when I'm stressed to the max (Thursday and Friday!!), I use exercise as my therapy instead
- I eat a good variety of foods
- I eat wholegrain breads and try to have as many pulses in my diet as possible
- I eat breakfast every day, even if it's just a bit of fruit and a soy drink - it's better than nothing
- I don't deprive myself, and hence don't feel the need to eat food I'm not hungry for just because it's there
- I enjoy my food and take pleasure in it - I eat things I like! What's the point otherwise?
- I drink a lot of water (I didn't take pictures of all that, because I thought it was a given! I drink about 4 litres a day)
- I always think before I reach for something....not only because it was a pain to take pictures of it or did I want the whole world knowing I was about to have a second oatmeal raisin cookie, LOL....but did I really want it?
- If I am hungry, I take the time to prepare a proper meal or to seek out something that will really satisfy me.
I've really become a fan of intuitive eating over the last few years, because I find the principles of it so relevant to maintenance. There are so many people out there who can explain it better than I could, but the basic principles that I try and apply to my life are:
- Have a positive attitude towards food and eating
- Eat slowly and enjoy your food
- Always keep your hunger in check and make sure you're eating because you're hungry, not for other reasons
- Nurture yourself and focus on feeling good
If you imagine the way you eat tracked on a graph, how do you think it would look? I think mine would look like a squiggle. Some days a bit bumpy, some days dipping below, but with a steady, solid medium going all the way through, balancing the bumps and dips. I think that is the ideal thing to aim for. Spread your eating out - don't think you have to eat the whole lot at once, and don't be too austere with yourself if you've had a less than ideal meal or day. It all balances out in the end.
I hope you enjoyed it. Maybe I'll do it again sometime.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
As for today................
9.00am: on rising, a cup of Lady Grey tea with soy milk, taken back to bed
[no picture sorry!]
Fruit and yoghurt smoothie
I divided the smoothie between 2 pint (475ml) glasses. It contained:
- 2 medium bananas
- 1/2 a punnet of strawberries
- Rest of the frozen mango (it wasn't very much, maybe 1/3 cup)
- 2 small tubs strawberry soy yoghurt
- A slurp of maple syrup
- Soy milk
Frittata and grilled sandwich
I'm in a grilled sandwich phase at the moment, and enjoy being able to make them on the weekend.
Frittata (to serve 2 people) made with:
- 4 organic eggs
- Sauteed cherry tomatoes, mushrooms, courgette (zucchini) and baby spinach
- 50 g manchego cheese
- Fresh basil
- 2 small pieces homemade 9 grain bread
- 1/2 a small avocado
- Grilled red pepper
- A few pieces grilled aubergine (eggplant)
- 2 bocconcini
- Rocket leaves
3.30pm - cup of tea
[no picture sorry!]
5.00pm - snack
Handful of cashews and an oatmeal raisin cookie
M - a slightly bigger handful than yesterday :P
8.30pm - dinner
Vegetarian canneloni with rocket and pear salad
- Spinach lasagna sheets, cooked until soft and then used to wrap the filling which contained: vegetarian mince, various fresh vegetables that needed using (red pepper, courgette, etc), then egg and some leftover herb flavoured low-fat Philly cheese and some greek yoghurt to bind; topped with tomato passata and a tiny bit of grated Grana Padano;
- Rocket with slivers of fresh pear, dressed with pepper, lemon and balsamic vinegar
- 1/2 a small glass of red wine while cooking dinner (couldn't hack it! Made me feel sick!)
- Sparkling grape juice
Upon rising, about 9am: tea
- 1 cup nettle and peppermint tea
- 1 cup Rachel's Organic Low fat rhubarb yoghurt
- 1/2 punnet strawberries
- Rest of the oatmeal raisin cookie, crumbled in
We resisted all the temptations of Portobello Rd markets and made our way up to the Yo! Sushi in Whiteley's for a brief miso-wasabi-pumpkin cake revival. They didn't have my favourite tofu salad on the belt today :(
- 2 cups miso soup
- 2 pieces salmon and avocado sushi
- 2 pieces crunchy prawn sushi
- 2 pieces pumpkin cake
- 2 tiny pieces cucumber and sesame sushi
We found ourselves in Covent Garden, and on a sunny day I cannot resist the 99% fat free frozen yoghurt from Muffinski's. They blend it with your choice of fruit. "Look at that pink!" I heard someone say as I left the shop.
- 1 regular cup frozen yoghurt blended with mango and raspberry
After getting home and collapsing a bit after our marathon walk across central London, I tucked into the following:
- 1 Organic cola, followed by a Hendrick's gin and tonic with cucumber
- Approximately 50g Manchego cheese (I didn't eat all of what's in the picture! ha ha)
- 4 strawberries
- Some oatcakes
- Handful of cashew nuts
8.30pm - dinner
All week I had been craving a sandwich that TS and I had in Paris last year - and didn't think I could wait until Sunday lunch time to have it. TS suggested I make it for dinner, so I did!
Vegetarian grilled sandwich a la Cojean
- 2 pieces homemade 9 grain bread
- Zana's homemade chilli jam
- Baby spinach
- Roasted red pepper
- Sauteed artichokes
- Lemon, salt and pepper
TS loves potato wedges, so I made grana padano wedges to go with:
- Potatoes cut into wedges, tossed with flour, paprika and a little finely grated grana padano cheese, cooked with cooking spray
- Served with a little Kewpie Japanese mayonnaise
Following dinner: (sorry, no pics!) [they wouldn't have been any good though!]
- Lots of drinks - at least another two gins, and at least one beer in there too......
Friday, March 20, 2009
9.00am - breakfast
- Muesli and tahini slice
- Alpro soy chocolate drink
4.00pm - lunch (Don't ask! All kinds of wrong!)
I think this is testimony to the muesli-tahini slice and how filling it is! Although it was not an ideal time for lunch, I wasn't eating my own shoes with hunger, surprisingly.
- Beet and chickpea health pot from Crussh: beetroot, chickpea and coriander salad
- Fresh carrot juice
7.30pm - before shopping snack
- 1/2 an oatmeal raisin cookie
Stirfry with basmati rice
My portion included:
- Stirfry made with red onion, "chicken" pieces, brocolli, spring greens, kale, red pepper, cashews, coriander, homemade chilli jam, satay sauce and soy
- Basmati rice
- 1 ice-cold Innis and Gunn beer
It was one mighty busy day today. But I got a lot accomplished, so I'm very happy and looking forward to the weekend. I think I managed to eat very well today, despite not having any time to do so! I wish I'd been able to eat some more fruit. Maybe I'll have some strawberries before I go to bed......
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Juice and muesli-tahini bar (yes I finally made them!)
- Medium fresh orange juice from Crussh on the way to work (it was free! Crussh are giving away a free medium solo juice when you bring in your London newspaper for recycling this week - so not only was I getting something for free, I'm doing my bit for the planet too! Win win!)
- 1 piece muesli-tahini bar
1.00pm - cup of tea and a plum
3.00pm - lunch
Takeaway: mixed salad from Alara Wholefoods
There is a wholefoods shop near my work which does an amazing vegetarian and vegan buffet every lunchtime, where everything is sold by weight. They have all kinds of salads, gluten-free breads, and a range of hot dishes from lasagna to stirfries. Everything from there is always so good! Today, seeing I got there so late, there was just salad left - but that was fine with me because that was what I felt like!
My portion included:
Carrot and spinach salad
Carrot and puy lentil salad
Tortilla bread left in my work munchbox
NB: I picked out all the onions!!
9.40pm - dinner (don't ask!)
Homemade pizza and salad
My portion included:
- Pizza made with 1 small supermarket naan bread, tomato and vegetable pasta sauce, courgette (zuchinni), red pepper, mushrooms, 8 or 9 kalamata olives, brocolli, 1 Tofutti dairy free cheese slice, 30g grated grana padano and dried herbs
- Salad made with salad leaves, cucumber, avocado, sugar snap peas and a few cashew nuts for crunch, dressed with fresh orange juice and balsamic vinegar
- 1 can organic lemonade
Breakfast was great and kept me full until about 2ish, but I didn't get lunch until 3. Dinner was delayed quite significantly this evening - in the end I wasn't all that hungry but cooked and ate it anyway!
Looking forward to another fresh orange juice in the morning! Or will I get carrot....
My first memory is of laying on the pungent leather seats of my father's back Pontiac (I always thought it looked like a gangster car) as he and I roamed the streets late at night looking for our dog that had run away. My mother was on night shift at the hospital, so he couldn't leave me home alone. I just remember everything being very dark - the night, the car. I was about 2.
What is yours?
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Rhubarb yoghurt with dried cranberries and crumbled oatmeal cookie, soy drink and banana
- 1 cup Rachel's Organic low fat rhubarb yoghurt
- 1 oatmeal and raisin cookie, crumbled into the yoghurt
- Handful of dried cranberries
- 1 medium banana
- 1 Alpro chocolate soya drink
1.30pm - Crussh juice
Pineapple, orange, apple and carrot juice
2.45pm - lunch
Leftover "chicken" pie with mash and spring greens
Yu-um! Pastry went all soggy, just the way I like it. And it was more mash and green veg than pie - I left most of it for TS :)
7.30pm - dinner out with the lovely Amanda
We went to one of my favourite places, Hare and Tortoise, who do the most beautiful Asian food. There is always a line out the door. We were hungry by the time we sat down!
Starter: Vegetarian duck rolls (we had two each)
They had tofu, cucumber, spring onion and hoisin sauce in them
A superb Chilean Sauvignon Blanc - we shared a bottle, and I had about two and a half glasses....I think! I outdrank Amanda anyway!
Main course: vegetarian chow mein with tofu, mushrooms and chinese greens
9.30pm - dessert
Two squares of Top Deck chocolate (rationing my last bar from Christmas!)
I was going to bake my muesli and tahini slice last night but burned my hand cooking dinner and therefore going anywhere near an oven was not an option! I don't think having children is an option for me until or unless my pain threshold becomes a lot higher! Having said that it was a significant burn. Perhaps I was a witch in a past life, I have a talent for getting burned.
So yes, therefore, not the best breakfast, but the best I could muster with what I had at work! Really should get up earlier :P
Had a late lunch as I went for a walk with a work friend, and she bought us juices from Crussh on the way to the park. So lovely sitting in the sunshine. London weather has been beautiful this week!
Dinner with Amanda - Hare and Tortoise has gorgeous food and there's so many healthy options to choose from. I felt like noodles so went for the chow mein. I haven't eaten out for weeks, so had been looking forward to this very much. Also the first alcohol I've had since the weekend. I tend to save it for either going out or for weekends.
Will try and do the muesli slice tonight before going to bed!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
• verb 1 (of an army) withdraw from confrontation with enemy forces. 2 move back from a difficult situation. 3 withdraw to a quiet or secluded place.
• noun 1 an act of retreating. 2 a quiet or secluded place. 3 a period or place of seclusion for the purposes of prayer and meditation. 4 a military musical ceremony carried out at sunset.
— ORIGIN Latin retrahere ‘draw back’.
Betsy (whose owl earrings I am coveting big time!) wrote that before she made a momentous decision to follow her heart into launching her own business, she spent a day doing a "Betsy Retreat Day" where she just spent the day in a coffee shop, weighing up her options.
I think I need something like that. A break. Some space. A "Green Ink Retreat Day".
There is a lot of noise in my head right now. I think I need to take stock of a lot of things, work out what's working for me and what isn't. But most importantly, I just think I need to finally put my money where my freakin' mouth is. I tell other people to follow their dreams and not to hesitate for another second, but I very rarely follow my own advice. That has to change. Or nothing will.
In the meantime, I still have Emily Bronte, Frank Zappa, David Bowie and hyacinths on the verge of blooming. I hope I am the hyacinths.
Porridge with mango, dried cranberries and rhubarb yoghurt
- 1 cup homemade muesli (it makes the best porridge, you get all the nuts and seeds in it too)
- Semi skimmed milk (no soy left at work) and some boiling water
- 1/2 cup frozen mango pieces
- Handful dried cranberries
- 1/2 cup Rachel's Organic low fat rhubarb yoghurt
12.40pm - cup of tea
See how full breakfast kept me!
1 mug nettle and peppermint tea
2.00pm - lunch
Leftover swede and sweet potato curry with kale and basmati rice
8.15pm - dinner
it would have been earlier had I not burned my hand and farted around for half an hour with a bandage!
Practically Vegan Chicken Pie with spring greens and mash
My serve included
1 slice of pie (made from puff pastry, "chicken" pieces, soy milk bechamel, leeks, courgette, etc) - I added lots of spinach to the filling today
1 small serve of swede and potato mash
Lots of microwaved spring greens
Seeing I was so hungry yesterday, I brought heaps of snacks to work today (banana, oatmeal raisin cookie, dried cranberries) but didn't need them because my porridge kept me so full until about 1.30 and then I was hungry for curry leftovers! My curry kept me satisfied until about 7 when I was home from my run and started getting dinner ready.